Mature Content

A ten-page original adult-comedy script

FADE IN: 

EXT. CAPE TOWN – MORNING

The tourist’s view from Table Mountain allows the city to seem resplendent in the warm glare of the Summer dawn. Peace and breezy silence are present for a beat.

Then deep, distant noises slowly rise, revealing themselves as the surprised moans of A.M. orgasms.

An oblivious dassie scurries along the edge of the

vantage-point.

EXT. JUST ABOVE THE CITY – CONTINUOUS

A bird’s-eye view of the little labyrinths of houses,

businesses, parks and streets composing the central city.

The people predictably look like ants in an ant-farm.

The concerted moans grow incrementally louder.

EXT. LONG STREET – CONTINUOUS

Business hours are commencing, the pavements start their

usual swell of humanity. The South African flag facade at

the top of the road’s slope looks especially bright

juxtaposed with the surrounding gold and shade.

The multi-vocal moans seem to be rising to a climax, so to

speak.

An ADULT WORLD establishment, in contrast, stands lonely and

literally dirty between a pretentious restaurant and a

vintage store.

INT. ADULT WORLD – CONTINUOUS

The moans ever so suddenly stop.

SESANE – 21, short and beautiful with blue-black hair and

dusty brown eyes and skin – wears a weightless expression,

as if she’s also just swooped over the city.

                SESANE 

              Ah, fuck.

(CONTINUED) 

CONTINUED: 

2. 

                    ROBERTO (O.S.)

          That’s the spirit.

SHE glares back at him from behind the counter, as quickly

as her eyes can roll.

ROBERTO – 39, with a characteristic paunch, curly black hair

and 8 o’clock shadow – is busy studying some of the store’s

merchandise on a grainy box TV in the recessed

employee-room. Two piles of DVD’s – presumably ’checked’ and

’unchecked’- stand either side of him. A blindingly red door

frames his crouched body.

                    ROBERTO

          Not even a chuckle? What’s up with

          you, little Ses?

                    SESANE

          At least you’ll never get to call

          me that again, I guess.

                    ROBERTO

          Ah, you’ll miss it, and you’ll miss

          me, eventually. Maybe not this

          place though, maybe. I don’t think

          I’ll even miss this place.

                    SESANE

          Yeah, fuck this place in the ass.

Now it’s ROBERTO’s turn to glare at her. SESANE smiles,

having gotten the reaction she wanted. She picks up a rubber

dildo from beside the cash register and starts

absent-mindedly twirling its tip with her finger.

ROBERTO switches off the set and emerges from his seat,

noticeably uncomfortable with the necessity of standing

upright. On his way out the room he picks up a promotional

whiteboard leaning in the corner.

                    ROBERTO

               (Sighing)

          Porn never sleeps, as they say.

EXT. ADULT WORLD – CONTINUOUS

ROBERTO and SESANE come out of the front entrance, he to set

the whiteboard, she because there’s nothing else to do. The

natural light is pretty violent in contrast to the permanent

dinginess inside.

(CONTINUED) 

CONTINUED: 3. 

ROBERTO takes a marker out of his pocket and scrawls on the

board: ’CLOSING DOWN SALE. EVERYTHING MUST GO. 90% OFF

KOREAN MILF DVD’S’

                    ROBERTO

          So I take it your uncle doesn’t

          have a Plan B lined up for you?

                    SESANE

          It’s not really his problem I

          guess. 

                    ROBERTO

          Yeah, so any luck solving it

          yourself? 

                    SESANE

          Do you honestly care or are you

          just asking? 

                    ROBERTO

          Bit of both. I try to be sincere

          three or four times a week.

ROBERTO steps back, admiring his handiwork, before taking

out a last pre-office-hours cigarette, lighting it and then

smoking it like he’s being filmed.

                    SESANE

          Even waitressing needs experience

nowadays… 

                    ROBERTO

          Eight part-time months with me’s

          been an experience, hasn’t it?

                    SESANE

          Not the kind they’re looking for.

                    ROBERTO

          Fuck that. I’ll give you a pristine

          reference if you need it.

                    SESANE

          Thanks, I don’t think it’ll help.

                    ROBERTO

          It should.

                    SESANE

          Roberto, I don’t … really want

          this on my c.v.

An uncomfortable silence.

ROBERTO stubs out his half-finished cigarette and trots

inside. Sesane follows, just remembering to swap around the

sign hanging on the door from Closed to Open.

INT. ADULT WORLD – CONTINUOUS

They both return to standing behind the counter.  ROBERTO

ceremoniously folds his arms but gazes at the contents of

the closest DVD rack instead of at SESANE.

                    ROBERTO

          Can I ask what your issue is with

          this place? 

                    SESANE

          Nothing, no issue. I just don’t

          want every employer I’ll ever have

          knowing I worked in a porn store.

                    ROBERTO

          I would think it’d be seen as a

          mark of character. Aspirational

          student, ready to do any decent job

          to fund her studies…

                    SESANE

               (Grinning)

          ’Decent’. Have you ever worked

          anywhere else?

                    ROBERTO

          Not the point. No-one will care

          that you’ve worked here, just that

          you’ve worked. Stop being such a

          priss all of a sudden.

Another silence. SESANE, taken aback but still a little

distant, looks around at the unpeopled aisles.

                    SESANE

          I think your sign’ll get stolen.

          And no-one’s gonna come in for this

          anyway.

                    ROBERTO

          Give it a minute, you’ll be

          surprised. 

The view from the counter reveals a full acreage of DVD

racks, piles of sex toys, lingerie on the walls etc.

Abandoned, for the moment.

CUT TO: 

4. 

INT. ADULT WORLD – LATE AFTERNOON

The same view, now with seemingly as many people inside the

store as were swelling in Long Street earlier. Word must

have gotten out just in time.

All races seem represented, as well as every age above 17.

It still being a porn store, every group is speaking in

whispers but the place is so full that a general drone of

commentary presides. SESANE is busy servicing a line winding

round the room from the counter to the door.

A series of customers each successively step forward with

their purchases and a strange inquiry.

                    CUSTOMER #1

          Do vibrators come in a ’kiddie’

          size? 

                    CUSTOMER #2

          Does ’XXX’ mean roman numerals? Is

          there a ’Hot Sweaty Sluts

          Twenty-Nine’ somewhere?

                    CUSTOMER #3

          Do you have the movie of ’Fifty

          Shades of Grey’? I’ve heard it’s

          really explicit.

SESANE, only a little fazed, robotically continues working

through the line.

A time-lapse montage captures the swift swirl of the store’s

shifting populace, a few occasional uncaught shoplifters,

members of couples holding up lingerie for their partner’s

consideration, guys and girls ducking in and out of the

red-curtained viewing booths, SESANE packaging every

customer’s purchase while ROBERTO carouses amongst the crowd

etc.

INT. ADULT WORLD – LATE EVENING

Eventually, the line starts thinning out as the store’s

stock reaches near-complete depletion.

SESANE finally finishes serving the last person in the line

and nearly allows her heavy head to fall to the counter.

Instead she leans back, her face staring up into the

flourescent light, hands crossed on her forehead, taking

deep breaths, relieved that the worst is over.

(CONTINUED) 

5. 

CONTINUED: 6. 

Only a few stragglers remain, and those only suspiciously

youthful browsers surveying the priceless porn posters on

the walls.

ROBERTO, hands in pockets, comes up and plants himself on

the counter like a 12 year-old.

                    ROBERTO

          I hate to say I told you so bu-. No

          wait, I love saying I told you so.

          I love it so much. It must be one

          of my favourite pastimes.

SESANE honestly doesn’t care about his taunts. She’s just

looking out at the store, smiling slightly, in an exhausted

peace. ROBERTO looks ruffled, definitely unused to an

unreactive partner.

                    ROBERTO (CONT’D)

          Sorry, this was actually better

          than I ever expected too…

          Alright, I’m heading out for a

          takeaway. Can I get you a burger or

          something?

                    SESANE

          Sure, surprise me.

Roberto gives two thumbs up and strolls out the door,

holding it open for the last of the browsers to leave and

then for a varsity-aged male customer to quickly sneak in.

SESANE wakes up a bit. This is MATTHEW – 22, shaggy hair,

puffy jacket and shuffling gait – and he doesn’t acknowledge

her for a moment, gazing around the desolate store in

half-wonder

He arrives at the counter.

                    MATTHEW

          Hey, Evening.

                    SESANE

          It is, yeah, hey. What can I help

          you with? 

                    MATTHEW

          Umm, yeah. Wait, you’re also on

          campus, right? I’m sure I’ve seen

          you.

(CONTINUED) 

CONTINUED: 

7. 

                    SESANE

          Yeah, I’ve seen you too. Matthew,

          right? 

                    MATTHEW

          Right. And you’re,

          suh-seh…Sesane?

                    SESANE

          Yes, well done, impressive.

                    MATTHEW

          Thanks. Are you guys closing down

          or something?

                    SESANE

               (Sarcastic)

          We are, how’d you guess?

                    MATTHEW

          Wow, so I made it just in time…

          I’m a rare films collector you see,

          and I’m looking for something very,

          very specific.

He looks around again, a little unsettled.

                    MATTHEW (CONT’D)

               (Blushing)

          It’s called … ’Frolicsome

          Fairies’. The oldest erotic film

          still commercially available,

          apparently. From like 1919, I

          think.

                    SESANE

          Oh really? Interesting. I haven’t

          seen it, but I can consult the

          system.

                    MATTHEW

          Please do. I’ve searched pretty

          much everywhere else…

She does so, tapping away at a late-90’s PC with a brown

keyboard on the counter. After a nervous beat…

                    SESANE

          Bingo… But it’s only on VHS, and

          in the owner’s personal collection.

(CONTINUED) 

CONTINUED: 

8. 

                    MATTHEW

          Can I still buy it from him?

                    SESANE

          I guess, but it’ll be costly, and

          we’ll have to go in there to find

          it.

She points behind her to the very red door in the employee

room.

                    MATTHEW

          Am I allowed to go in there?

                    SESANE

          It’s not too dangerous, and I’ll

          need you to help steady the ladder.

SESANE takes out an enormous key from somewhere beneath the

counter.

                    MATTHEW

          The ladder?

CUT TO: 

INT. ROBERTO’S PORNOGRAPHIC PLANETARIUM – LATE EVENING

SESANE switches the light on. She and MATTHEW are standing

in the gleaming red doorway. MATTHEW gazes round again, this

time in full wonder.

                     MATTHEW

          Well. Gosh.

His shock is well-founded. The room is spherical and huge,

completely mismatched with the rest of the building,

comprising about a dozen shelves of videos, DVDs and even

laserdiscs wrapped completely round its edge and stacked up

from floor to high ceiling. Only a small door on the

opposite side indicates an exit.

SESANE erects a wheeled step-ladder that had been lying shut

beside the entrance-door.

                    MATTHEW (CONT’D)

          This is like the chocolate room in

          Willy Wonka’s factory.

                    SESANE

          Yeah, I think that was Roberto’s

          idea too. Except he would never let

                    (MORE)

(CONTINUED) 

CONTINUED: 

9. 

                    SESANE (cont’d)

          anyone else in here, even with a

          golden ticket… Let me see, ’F’

          for ’Frolicsome’… Ah, over there.

She wheels the ladder clockwise along the shelves until she

reaches the F section.

                    SESANE (CONT’D)

          It’s stacked so that the oldest

          ones are on the top and the newest

          on the bottom. Not helpful in this

          situation at all, but just hold

          this steady for now.

MATTHEW assents. She climbs the ladder. He chivalrously

studies the room again instead of looking up. With each step

the rungs creak louder.

Standing on tip-toes on the very top rung, she can just

survey the top shelf. ’Frolicsome Fairies’ is there, on the

very left of the section, in a VHS box seemingly made of

dust.

                    SESANE (CONT’D)

          Found it. 

                    MATTHEW

          Wow! Really?

                    SESANE

          Yeah, I just can’t reach it. Can

          you shift the ladder over a bit?

He gingerly does so. She stays steady, and, leaning over,

finally gets to grasp the box. Just as she triumphs, the top

rung breaks.

In sudden succession, SESANE desperately grabs onto the top

shelf to stay aloft, but this too breaks and as she falls

the F section utterly collapses, one section crashing down

on top of another.

Fortunately, MATTHEW does have the reaction skills to take

the gap and catch her while pornography spills out around

them.

The crash and disturbance then also causes a protracted

domino effect in many of the other sections, leaving the

floor strewn with small avalanches of porn and the air

overwhelmed with dust.

(CONTINUED) 

CONTINUED: 10. 

The disaster finishes. MATTHEW and SESANE sit back up amidst

their particular overflow. ’Frolicsome Fairies’ is lying

between them, intact. She picks it up and gives it to him.

The dust clears a little. They look back at the store.

ROBERTO is standing in the doorway holding a big Steers bag,

looking like he’s about to start crying.

EXT. ADULT WORLD – NIGHT

ROBERTO locks up the store while MATTHEW and SESANE stand by, solemn and sullen.

                    ROBERTO

          Well, Ses, I don’t think you’ll

          have to care anymore about this

          coming up on your C.V. No ill will,

          but you understand I’d rather

          pretend you never worked here?

                    SESANE

          Yeah, I do. Can I ask a last favour

          though?

                    ROBERTO 

What?

                    SESANE

          Can Matthew keep his video? It was

          why this happened anyway.

                    ROBERTO

          Let me see it.

MATTHEW hands ’Frolicsome Fairies’ over. ROBERTO briskly

examines it.

                     ROBERTO

          Sure, for twenty. Nothing really

          happens in it.

MATTHEW can’t believe his luck. He rushes to make the

exchange and thank ROBERTO.

                    ROBERTO (CONT’D)

          It’s not like I can tell you not to

          do that again… Anyway, go fuck

          around somewhere else, kids.

ROBERTO leaves down the street in a melodramatic huff.

MATTHEW and SESANE stand together awkwardly for a beat.

(CONTINUED) 

CONTINUED: 

11. 

                    SESANE

          I have a VCR, and I live two

          streets over, if you want to watch

          it now?

                    MATTHEW

          Yeah, that’d be… that’d be

          awesome.

SESANE leads off, crossing the street, MATTHEW in tow.

                    MATTHEW (CONT’D)

          It’s so cool that you work in an

          Adult World, by the way. I’ve never

          known anyone brave enough to work

          there.

                    SESANE

          If you think so, thank you. It’s

          not a bad experience.

                    MATTHEW

          Uh, what are you studying?

                    SESANE

          Romantic Literature. Yourself?

Their voices fade as they retreat further down Long Street.

FADE OUT: